Just Lynn

One woman. One name. One hell of an attitude!

2019 summary

Written By: witchypo - Feb• 02•20

Seeing that we’re already a month into the new year, I figured it might be a good idea to write a little about 2019 (year of the Pig)while things are still fresh in my memory. It was not one that I’d qualify as a ‘good’ year for me, which seems odd to me because I would have thought that a Horse would do well in a Pig year. Of course, I didn’t have a lot of time or opportunity to consider the pig nature of the year, but I do believe I saw it in the people around me, who often demonstrated quick bursts of ferocious anger and resentment, often without provocation, which were often driven by jealousy and greed for material things. I also found that food and creature comforts were in abundant supply, and that it seemed I was constantly cleaning and cooking.

Financially, it was a decent year with few major (unexpected) expenses or ‘turn arounds’. I was able to meet my needs and to make small advances, while having enough to share with others.

In relation to learning and travel, I did little, although I did start crafting (sewing) a little again, and our family got the chance to camp at Chippawa Nature Conservation Area, which was an amazing experience. I also did well with my garden, and my plants yielded the largest crop I’ve gotten out of it, yet!

Work wise, little changed, although management seems to be treating me better than they have in the past, which is a great relief, and I’ve been able to minimize the number of chores I’m expected to perform on a daily.

2019 was a banner year for me when it came to friends, and I’ve been amazed at the outpouring of love and support I’ve received, often from the most unexpected sources.

Physically, 2019 was an up-and-down year. In April and May, I went through some very scary experiences, which lead to visits to my GP, as well as a cardiologist and various labs. I quit smoking for 4 months, made some changes, and recovered quite well, though, and have been advised that my heart’s fine, although I do have to be careful of other major organs. This has led to many tweaks to diet and lifestyle, which seems to be having a positive affect.

Of all the areas of my life, that of ‘romantic’ connections is the one that changed most in 2019. My (then) boyfriend and I started the year on very shakey ground, due to a great degree to his narcissistic selfishness, and I told him clearly that while I loved him and wanted our relationship to continue, I’d need to see him put concerted and consistent effort into cooperating and changing/growing with me, or I would disassociate myself for my own well-being.

As usual, though, he failed to see this as an ‘opportunity’, and took it, instead, as an ‘attack’. He attempted to molify me by suggesting the use of a book/process to save our relationship, but when he failed to do the exercises and meet the goals it prescribed and, eventually, abandoned the effort, I was very disappointed. Generally speaking, he seemed to be biding his time and BSing to keep things together, while I tried to be patient and to give him oportunities, but also quit making excuses for him, and faced the reality of our situation.

Then, in Sept/Oct of 2019, he made the mistake of trying to get me to ignore the ‘boundary’ I’d set about ‘time’, and jerked my chain on a kayak deal, and I left him.

The ‘break up’ went fairly quickly and smoothly, and he started dating his next chick that week, while I’ve been working on processing and healing, since.

Another area of change in 2019 has been my mother’s health. She started deteriorating mentally and physically, and has begun to suffer from heart and lung problems, as well as quickly advancing dementia. In the latter quarter of the year, she was in and out of hospital, and is now on oxygen 24/7. My sister and I have been doing our best to help mom, but we’re not hopeful.

Ironically, between my break up and the situation with Mom, you’d think I’d be stressed to the max, but I’m proud to say that I’m dealing fairly well with both situations, and coping with the change and stress. This has likely got to do with the fact that, since I’m no longer having to split my week between my place and my Ex’s, I’ve had more time to take care of and enjoy my home, am no longer having my heart broken on a regular, and my sister is bearing the brunt of the stress with Mom.

I’m sure there’s more I could write, but this should be enough to jog my memory if needed in future.

You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.