Time to time, I’ve had this odd health problem or that pop up and I’ve mentioned it to whichever doctor might have been treating me at the time. Usually, because each appeared random and unconnected to any other of my health issues, they’ve been dismissed. Recently, however, I’ve begun to wonder whether they might be connected(?)

I was scared to talk to my doctor about it for a number of reasons…

• I’ve got a bad memory (like I have to do the math to know how old I am!) that makes it hard for me to tell doctors when something started or how long it lasted, which seems to make them doubt me
• my last doc was great ’till he prescribed a drug he said had no side affects and I told him it did, including brief but severe bouts of imbalance or diziness. Then, he suddenly questioned his diagnosis of me (arthritis), accused me of being paranoid (said it was all in my head) and of ‘faking’ to get out of work, stopped prescribing pain meds and treated me like an ‘abuser’, and threatened to quit treating me if I didn’t take them.
• My current doctor doesn’t seem to like it when I use any medical terminology or come close to suggesting I have a particular condition (i.e. ‘I think I’ve got a cold’ etc) and I don’t want to alienate him
• I don’t trust our drive-through medical system, which teats ‘disease’, not ‘people’, and I’m scared I’ll be forced to take pharmaceuticals, which can do as much damage as good
• I don’t have medical coverage so, even if he prescribes treatments, I can’t afford them, which is likely to lead my doc to believe I’m unwilling to work with him

Despite my fears, though, I forced myself to talk to him about these issues last week, and his reaction seemed to indicate that he doubted me. So, I went back today for a physical, and was worried about how he’d treat me.

Luckily, Dr. Dreamy (a fellow patient calls him that, so I will too) treated me with the same courtesy and respect he always has, and we got through the physical okay. The one thing I noticed, however, is that he didn’t really ask questions about the symptoms I’d mentioned, although he did surprise me by asking about a flutter or skip in my heart (something I’ve suspected is happening but, again, was afraid to mention).

Then, he prescribed massage for my ‘tendonitis’ again, and sent me on my way.

The truth is that I can’t afford it, but I guess I’ll have to give it a shot.